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. Yes, Nightshade said, and even he sounded a li le stunned. These are the co-ordinates the twins gave us. Right.Am I in a Tim Burton movie? Hex plaintively asked.Before them was a sprawling town pulled right out from a children s story book,with candy cane lamp posts and red brick houses, their roofs covered by a neat layerof snow.Tiny people Hex s mind refused to even contemplate the word elves rushed around among the buildings in suits of green and red, carrying brightly co-loured boxes.A large sign declared WELCOME TO CHRISTMAS TOWN in loopyneon-red le ers.Beside the sign was a picture of Santa s smiling face. I was given to understand Santa Claus doesn t exist, Ven said.The solar-fuelledbastard wasn t even shivering. Yeah, you and the rest of the world barring kids under ten, dude, Hex replied. Atlantis exists, Fantasia pointed out slowly. So I suppose we shouldn t be sur-prised Santa does either. But Atlantis is a real myth! Shockwave said, waving his arms.Before the conversation could get any dumber, one of the li le people came run-ning over.Up close, they were a li le taller than Hex s knees and appropriately propor-tioned. Hello visitors! he (she?) greeted them in helium-tuned voice. Welcome to Christmas Town! It was in moments like these that Hex was glad he wasn t the leader.Instead ofpanicking over what to say to a miniature person who resembled mall elves all over theworld, it was so much easier to watch Fantasia fumble instead. Uh, hello, Fantasiasaid. Hello! the person-who-wasn t-an-elf said again, still happy. Welcome toChristmas Town! My name is Mathy. Fantasia looked uncertainly at the rest of them.All of them to a one, shrugged. Thanks, guys, Fantasia dryly, turning back to the midget.She smiled brightly. HelloMathy. Hello! Welcome to Christmas Town! Fantasia s smile faded a li le. You ve said that three times.Okay, let s try this:take us to your leader. At that, Hex was unable help giving Fantasia a judging look.Still determinedly smiling, Fantasia mu ered, Shut up, Hex, unless you want todo this. Hex mimed zipping his mouth shut.The goddamn elf Hex figured there was no point in pretending he/she wasanything else chirped out a reply involving the words of course and for the gloryof our Lord and Master and waddled away.One by one, they all began to follow, ex-cept for Grayson, who was looking at the device in his hand with a peculiar expressionon his face.Hex cleared his throat three times, each time successively louder, beforeGrayson got the hint and began to move as well.Trying not to feel like Lassie, Hextrudged after Grayson, coughing loudly every time the man strayed.Preoccupied with babysi ing Grayson, Hex didn t have much of a chance to cap-ture the scenery as they were lead to the centre of the town.He got the impression itwas a stressful time of year, however; all the elves he saw were rushing around withstrained, tearful faces, their voices streaming into each other s seamlessly until it waswhite noise.They all looked at Hex and company, but only once and not for long.Fairenough, it was Christmas tomorrow.Mathy, with mincing, bouncing steps, lead them along a winding path to a largebuilding in the center of the li le town.It was built out of red bricks, and had cast-ironflues do ing the roof, sending up puffs of pale grey smoke into the sky.A li le voiceinside of Hex that sounded just like his hippie mother screeched in disgust.There was a long line of elves in front of the building, all of them with brightlycoloured toys in hand.Mathy walked past them all, smiling and nodding at some ofthem.Only a few smiled back, Hex noticed.And at the head of the line, in a bright redand white suit, larger than life and so real Hex wanted to cry a li le, was Santa Claus. This is officially the weirdest thing that s happened to me, Shockwave declared. Even more than that time you were a chick? Hex s mouth said on automatic.Shockwave kicked Hex, which was so not cool when Santa Claus was right there. Hey! What happens on Halloween stays there, Catboy. A hand gripped Hex s arm, its twin around Shockwave s shoulder, and Fantasiahissed viciously, We re in front of freaking Santa Claus and so help me if you act likekids I m sending you both back to the shu le. Fantasia was never more terrifying than when she was acting like Hex s mum.Hex nodded furiously, and saw Shockwave doing to same out of the corner of his eyes.Fantasia glare a li le longer. Good, she said, le ing go.Hex stayed very, very still until Fantasia was out of hearing range, then elbowedShockwave. Dick, he mu ered. Pussy, Shockwave snarled, shoving Hex.Sometimes Shockwave seemed to forget he was a bodybuilding surfer dude, andHex was.not.The force of that push sent Hex tipping over and he might have fallenif not for a pair of hands that shoved him right back into neutral.Strike said nothing,only raised his eyebrows, and still Hex felt like he was being reprimanded.Flipping off Strike and his holier than thou a itude seemed like a good idea, soHex did, and he felt grim satisfaction when Strike s jaw twitched.It was a li le bitschoolyard but it felt good to have the advantage sometimes.Pleased, Hex shuffledover to Black Alice, who was watching Fantasia and Nightshade talk to and it wasnever gonna get old Santa Claus. We should ask him to say ho ho ho, Hex mu ered to Black Alice. Fuck that.I wanna sit on his lap, Shockwave said.Hex gave him a look. Li le too old for that kind of thing aren t you? he asked. Whatever, man.It d be cool.Santa s fucking lap! You re a li le bit of a freak, Hex told Shockwave.He waved away the outragedresponse he got and forced himself to focus on what was going on with Santa Claus.He tuned in just as Fantasia was saying in the most respectful voice he d everheard from her, Uh, thank you for the offer, sir, but we re actually here on official busi-ness.You wouldn t happen to have noticed anything strange around here would you? Fantasia sounded like she was choking on the words, but to give her credit, shemanaged to look Santa straight in the face as she said this.Hex wasn t sure he d be able to do the same if it was him in that same position.Santa Claus s flushed face turned even redder as his eyebrows scrunched togeth-er in intense concentration.It was so adorable Hex almost died a li le inside.SantaClaus was nothing like Hex s grandfather who was skinny and grumpy and baldbut there was that same sense of home and safety Hex remembered feeling around hisgrandfather.Maybe it was magic, or the weight of expectations, but Hex wouldn t havebeen surprised if Santa Claus fed them milk and cookies by the fireplace right then. Mathy! Santa called after a long moment of pondering.The elf came running up. Yes, m lord! Mathy squeaked.Santa leaned down, almost face to face and said, Mathy, do you remember thereport from last week? About the lights at Candy Mountain? Face lighting up with recognition, Mathy nodded eagerly. Oh yes! Blue lightsthat flew over Christmas Town! Very strange, m lord. Yes, Santa said, straightening. Very strange.Perhaps that s what you meant? The question was directed at Fantasia. I.perhaps? How far away is Candy Mountain? A hour s walk that way, Mathy replied helpfully, pointing north.More north.Fantasia turned to Nightshade.Hex knew what she was thinking.The twins pre-dictions were never wrong, so whatever was going on, it was right here.But if SantaClaus were saying otherwise, who was she to disagree? Nightshade tilted his head, notquite a nod but close enough to assent for Fantasia to make a decision [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]